Monday, February 21, 2005
dun ask. please.
Maybe it's the Monday blues. More likely, reality bites.
Am in a godawful mood today thinking about work. I guess it shows in my stoic expressions and monosyllabic replies. And out of concern, I guess, colleagues are asking me what's wrong. Again and again. One by one.
Really. Dun ask.
Please.
I'm feeling unappreciated, like I'm being taken advantage of just because I'm inexperienced. I know for a fact that she left because they didn't want to upgrade her, title- and pay-wise, and at the same time wanted to add on more duties to her portfolio. Which is now mine. And which they are successfully increasing.
It hasn't sat well with me for quite awhile now that I have taken over a senior position, and a heavier load than she had, for my current title and pay. If she felt ripped off, imagine how I feel.
Not too long ago, Jellyfish broke the news to me about the additional work I should have to take on. I returned the favour with a blank look. He tried to mitigate the situation by offering me handphone allowance. What one has got to do with the other, I dunno. But I guess it was a futile attempt at a give-and-take relationship. Like, here do this shite and that shite. Oh, and to make you feel better, here's $30.
No, I mean, seriously. How ridiculous is that?
Actually, I dunno what I want. I would love a bump upwards but deep down inside I know I'm too inexperienced to accept that.
Ok I take that back - I do know what I want.
I want to do what I like without the ridiculous burden of taking on other people's work. Like it's my problem your secretary is near illiterate. I guess that didn't occur to you when you hired her because you were too busy peering down her blouse. And now I have to take on her work because her incompetence is, 1) making you look bad and 2) resulting in you having to do actual work.
I really like what I do. I'll gladly take the bureaucratic shite if only you'd take away the crap you've piled on.
It's like I've finally gotten my hands on a beautiful yummy cake with all the icing I want... and you throw shit on top of it.
What's a girl to do? Slowly clear the shit, all the while having my eye fixated on the beauty that lies beneath? Or toss the whole damn thing away because it ain't worth it and it ain't even edible anymore?
I really dunno.
So please, dun ask.
// posted by the commentator @ 2:05 pm 
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